Posts Tagged ‘The Mark’

Some little kid probably already had these three guys on one of his Video Game teams

Pick the conversation that suits you

TBG: Hey, you remember when we were growing up in the mid 90’s (Insert The Mark Age joke here) and we would play Sega Genesis, Super Nintendo, and eventually N64?

Reader:

A)Yeah, of course, I had a huge collection of games

B) Yeah, kind of, I played them at a friends house

C) Yeah, but I only played Final Fantasy

D) No, I (read books, was Amish, sucked)

If you answered A or B keep reading

If you answered C or D please never comeback

TBG: Okay, so did you play those great sports games before everyone was forced to play the EA sports line almost exclusively?

Reader:

A) Sega had sports games?

B) I love Prime Time Football and Kobe Bryant in NBA Courtside!

C) EA for Life

If you answered A you are younger than 10 years old, thanks for being our youngest reader

If you answered C keep reading although you might not get this like B readers

If you answered B, This article is for you.

TBG: Besides being able to talk trash, what was your favorite part of those games?

Press the C button and let the trash talking begin

Reader:

A) The graphics, they are still great!

B) You could do ridiculous trades, force teams to release players although you weren’t in control of them, and no salary cap. So you could make your favorite team an all-star squad and destroy everyone.

C) Dude, I am sorry what were we talking about.

If you answered A or C, you’re in your own world.

If you answered B, you know we are kind of living this right now, right?

Team’s are moving around the NBA Free Agency market in order to have three of their own 2008 Dream-Teamers. We have all looked at the names floating around and thought “When did a (8-16) year old become in charge of this process.”

TBG: Yeah, the possible culprits  are Bosh, Wade, and the King himself.  They officially could kill the NBA.  If all of them decide to collude and go to Miami. It will be time to lay the NBA to rest.

Reader:

A) Yeah, you are right I would cancel my NBA court side and start watching Wrestling (probably not).

B) Com’on Bearded Guy, you know it was fun to dominate and rack up meaningless stats.

If you answered A you can skip ahead,  B readers continue you below.

TBG: I know what you’re saying Reader B, I did it too and had a stellar lineup on Kobe’s Courtside:

Kobe Bryant, Allen Iverson, Tim Duncan, Shaq, Shareef, Ray Allen, Antoine Walker, KG, Eddie Jones, Jason Kidd…to name a few.

Memphis learned their GM skills from this game

But let me ask you this, how long did you enjoy playing when it wasn’t competitive? How many,if  more than one, seasons did you play that video game through?

Reader:

A) 2 months, and I played a season and half, I was the MVP, Finals MVP, and set a scoring record. What’s your point?

B) I think I got you….

If you answered A or B keep reading.

TBG: The point is that you got bored with dominance. You were at the top of the game could do whatever you wanted as a team and you wanted to go and play something else. This is how it’s going to be for fans and even that team, if they land all three players. It’s not fun for fan if the outcome of a season is pretty much determined and it’s not fun for a player if their isn’t a challenge to overcome, if everything comes to easy, and they never have to take over single-handedly. It also leads to issues with touches, shot attempts, and endorsement dollars.

Reader:

A) What about Shaq and Kobe situation, MJ and Pippen type situation (see also Bird and Celts and Magic and Kareem), or Kobe and Gasol situation?

B) That makes sense!

If you answered A see below,

If you answered B you can skip ahead.

TBG: Those situations are much different.  When Shaq and Kobe were together Shaq was the clear Alpha Dog. MJ was the alpha, plus Pippen was drafted by the Bulls, and Gasol was a numbers guy, not a wins guy, in no way did he challenge Kobe for  Alpha status. Plus the Gasol trade was a crime against the Association.  In all these situations, the personalities fit together and were not brokered together in some kid’s imagination.

Reader:

A) The Truth shall set me free

B) I guess, although I don’t totally agree

If you answered either keep reading

TBG: This is where the EA gamer comes in, how many seasons do you play in Dynasty mode trying to sign good free agents, or prospects, or develop your players?

Reader:

A) All the time, my teams status continues to improve and there are often difficult things to achieve in building a Dynasty.

B) I was the Sega and Super Nintendo guy, can you explain what this means in life terms.

They can't be in the same jersey: for us and for them

TBG: I think of it like this. Lebron and Wade are Alpha dogs for sure. Both great players with their own legend built up where they currently play. Playing together would ruin one or both of their E/A Dynasty modes. Being the best player in the league and wanting to be one of the best of all-time would be kind of over shadowed when you teamed up with the second best in order to win your share of championships.  Kings do not have a Co-King. Kings do not share their throne. Kings don’t defer to a number two. King is a singular title.  Bosh is more of your Gasol type, and the Raptors are at a place where they can only get a sign and trade value out of him, but only if it’s a deal they can agree on. They will probably end up with less than Memphis did for Gasol. So Miami might buy Wade a sidekick for the future. I guess I can deal with that, but the epic event of all three teaming up would lead me to take my copy of the NBA down to the used game store and try to get some cash for my memories.

Enjoy Our Video Game July

The Bearded Guy

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No words

No one has posted since The Collins Effect. So I wanted to throw something up there that was fresh for any of our followers. Recently the circulation of Ghetto work out videos have been making there way around the DMZ teachers.  At first I thought these were going to be mock work out videos until I saw these CRAZY works on top of Bus stations, cross walk signs, playgrounds, park pavilions, and trash cans.

What you need:

All the participants appear to be on HGH or some other form of The Clear. They are crazy swoll.  Just noticing but you haven’t seen any white guys caught doing the Ghetto workout, but I have concluded that John Cena must have had an official “24 ghetto pass “.  John has jorts, no shorts, quarterback wrist bands (substitute for gloves), as for shoes? ask The Mark.

John loves Jorts

Ghetto Workout even has a celebrity representative (Cause people under WWE contracts do not count as celebrities)….

Who can forget the Driveway workout/interview

Terrell practiced the principals of the 24 hr Ghetto Workout by doing sit-ups  during his interview in a driveway. Way to rep’ it TO!

Enjoy these masterpieces

Yeah I know! Now you do too….

The Bearded Guy

Dear Reverse Oreo Followers, that means just you sittingpugs,

I am back from the abyss to rescue you from reading about Wrestle Mania.  Turns out, The Mark still considers it a sport. Anyways, if you know me, a few of the readers do, you know I have been in a dark place this week and half….I saw KU go down to NIU. Although, I will never say WE won the 2008 national championship or WE lost to NIU. I am still a huge fan of my home state team.

This article is about my denial…my denial to listen to The Mark or to believe the elements of the breakdown coming.  Bill Simmons has been the only one to mention this…he beat me to it…it’s the Sherron Collins Affect. Announcers love him, he played tough basketball, he is the winningest player in Kansas basketball history, he led a team minus 6 of the players from the national championship team to a big 12 title and sweet 16, but he is the reason Kansas lost and the reason this years team seemed so disjointed.

Lets break it down…..Kansas wins the 2008 National Title six players leave due to graduation or the draft. 5 are drafted. So whats left for KU is Collins and some what Aldrich. Cole had a great game in the semi-final which gave fans a glimpse of the future, but no one was expecting much from this team in 2009.  So there are zero seniors and one junior to speak of….Sherron…it became his team.  He battles! He carries a youthful team with potential but typically plays like at their experience level. He carries  them so much and so often that in the tournament last year other players are petrified to shoot, and it shows in their percentages and attempts. The role playing white guys (Reed and Morningstar) have no confidence in the one skill that lets them be on the floor (3 pointer) and Sherron only trusts Cole as a secondary scoring option. It was alright against North Dakota State, it was more than enough than Dayton. Then came Michigan State….Sherron muscling down the stretch…missing a key shot, then turning it over, then missing his one free throw. And the year is over.

Sherron and Cole stay, Kansas has an amazing recruiting class, all but one pretty much rode the bench this year, and the young guys have matured. Pre-season number one, potentially 3 All-Americans with depth and Tyshawn Taylor coming off a stellar summer as a leader in u19 international competition. Then the season begins:

-Tyshawn looks uncomfortable on the floor and like he doesn’t quiet fit in to a specific roll. Making him sloppy with the ball several times early and down the stretch.

Explanation:  Sherron has decided to be the team’s leader he must also being the teams point guard. He handles most of the offensive sets and has a high number of turnovers numerous times.

-Cole Aldrich doesn’t look like “Tournament Cole”, you know the one who had a triple double with blocks and a smooth hook shot.

Explanation: Many things a foot injury and family member passing away, but also his touches all year depended on how many offensive rebounds he could get, Sherron’s drive style offense created a ton on congestion in the paint. No room to get Cole the touches needed to wear down teams.

Xavier Henry disappears mid-season, January, making me believe Kansas has a shot to get him back next year. He disappeared so much that in the first K-State game, Self often went with the limited abilities to create their own offense of Morningstar and Reed over him. Giving into “Ok, we played these guys last year, all we have to do is give the ball to Sherron and let him do him.” That team looked like the tournament team from the year before, scared deferring to Sherron, turning the ball over trying to get it to him, didn’t we have two significant lower block threats? and an amazing wing player?  Atleast Sherron came through that time.

Explanation:  Xavier was not allowed to create because of Collins style of drive first-look second. I hope I can Thank Collins for that later.

Collins created all these problems because he had to be the leader, he had to be the scorer, he had to be the go to guy. A lot of people are blaming Self for this loss, for not letting his guys be the athletic guys they were against NIU. But this team was taken from Self a long time ago when it became all about Sherron.

Thanks for the memories, the wins, the good and bad, and for hopefully hurting Xavier’s draft stock enough that I get to see him in a Kansas Uniform one more year.

Notes:

Pre Bracket Final Four:

Syracuse, Kansas, Michigan State, and Kentucky.

The one odd one I pick sticks!

All Americans Still Alive:

John Wall, Eliminated: Elite 8

Evan Turner, Eliminated: Sweet 16

Wes Johnson, Eliminated: Sweet 16

Scottie Reynolds, Eliminated: Round of 32 almost Round of 64

DeMarcus Cousins, Eliminated: Elite 8.

Just saying…..

Thing to Watch Now:

The Pacific

How about KOREA: BLING BLING?!?

On Saturday I am officially requesting that the Korean Government change its slogan from “KOREA; SPARKLING!!” to “KOREA; SPARKLING FOOD POISONING.” I went out this last week with a couple of my fellow co-workers to celebrate the start of a new school year.  Naturally, I was psyched, because my personal life (iemoving apts and a plethora of other things) had been keeping me busy and kind of aloof lately. So this was a great opportunity for me to spend “quality time” with some individuals I genuinely like!  And, after my colleagues decided that ingesting large amounts of it, would be the best way to actually turn me into a Soju Bottle (소주), then decided (and I, in my newly found Soju induced INFINITE WISDOM, concurred) that it would be a great idea to eat lots of delicious raw meat called Bossam (보쌈) and (probably rotten) fish parts.  However, for some reason, the combination of the food and Soju decided they didn’t like foreigners and caused your favorite Blasian to hold all day meetings for the next 2 days in the Porcelain Room (or as the Koreans call it the 화장실 – I’ll let you translate that one on your own). And seeing as how within the last 2 -3 weeks about 4 other English Teachers here have had some varying level of Food Poisoning.  I think my request to change the slogan is not completely RiCOCKulous……

But the week is already starting to get better, as I have beautiful young women writing me poems (thanks again by the way) and come on, it can’t get much better than that!!!  So now that we’re all caught up on the life of K. Wong, it’s time for this weeks’………“Simply RiCOCKulous!”


1) I’m going to go out on a limb here and predict the Heisman winner for next year in College Football right now!  JEREMIAH MASOLI!!!…That’s right he’s going to finally get Oregon over the hump and out of USC’s shadow and lead his team to prominence…Well, that’s probably what I would have wrote if he hadn’t just been suspended for the ENTIRE Football SEASON next year for one of the most RiCOCKulous things ever!! Mr. Masoli decided it would be a great idea to steal a pair of laptops and a guitar!

Dude you were probably going to make millions in a little bit over a year by being selected in the NFL Draft….but NOOO! U you just couldn’t wait till then to get some new computers and live out your John Mayer fantasies, could you???  And I understand that you needed a computer with the faster bandwidth and increased memory so you can get the most out of Windows 7 and finish writing your thesis on the virtues of Man Coverage vs Zone, buf if you needed a computer that bad, go to the BOOSTERS!! That’s what they are there for!!  So to Jeremiah “I just lost a shot at the Heisman and Millions of Dollars” Massoli,  you might be able to know where to attack a zone coverage but your decision making ability off the field is…“Simply RiCOCKulous”!

Say Bye-Bye Jeremiah!!

2) The BeardedMan recommended that I talk about the Family Love-Fest that is NFL D-II Draft Prospect Tony Washington and the fact that HE REALLY DOES LOVE his family a little too much, but I thought that went beyond the RiCOCKulous, to the just plain disturbing.  So for this weeks second entry, I’m going to talk about the bore fest that was the Pacquiao vs. Clottey fight on this past Saturday. OMG if you paid money to see that, I’m sooooooo sorry and you have my deepest condolences.  I understand that Clottey had a defensive strategy but dang!! The entire fight could be summed up like this. 1st) Bell Rings 2nd) Manny comes out and punches and Clottey comes out and goes into the fetal position for a little over 2 mins. And every once in awhile Clottey would come out of his shell to hit Pac-Man with the an UPPERCUT (which I have no idea how he never saw coming!!) And the worst part is…I chose to watch the fight rather than go to the Penis and Vagina Festival in Japan!…I guess I’ll know better next time!

Anyway, here’s to hoping the Mayweather vs. Mosley fight is WAY more entertaining.  So to those who conspired to deny us the Mayweather vs. Pacquiao fight for the Clottey fight instead…you are “Simply RiCOCKulous”!


3) It is quite possibly the greatest time of the year for any basketball fan!  That’s right March Madness has officially descended upon us and if you are a manager, good luck getting people to do  work for the next couple of weeks…Plus, by now I’m sure you are tired of hearing about John Wall, Kentucky and Kansas!  And unlike the Mark or the BeardedMan I won’t continue to bore you with talk of the NCAA Tourney.  Instead I’ll focus on the ONLY BASKETBALL TOURNAMENT that matters…..that’s right, the N.I.T. aka the National Invitational Tournament (and not the “NOT INVITED Tournament” as some so rudely refer to it).

But in order to fully appreciate the majesty that is the N.I.T. let’s first imagine being the most powerful and respected person in your field and then having it all slip away when the new hot shot arrives to take your spot!  And now imagine the hard work you have ahead of yourself as you try to get back some semblance of the respect and power you had.  No, I’m not describing the plot for the new “Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps” movie, but the history of the N.I.T. Tourney which is actually older and originally crowned the National Champion until the NCAA decided to expand it’s tourney!

The Business World's version of the N.I.T.

And just to prove to you how great the N.I.T. is…where else are you going to see Annual College Basketball powers like Memphis, North Carolina, and UCONN play this March?  That’s right not in that SISSY NCAA Tourney, but only in the N.I.T.  now add to that a great lineup a Cincinnati team that was ranked as high as the top teens this year and let the fun begin.  That other tourney has 65 teams. Which means anybody and they momma could get in!! But not so in the MANLY N.I.T., only the most hardened 32 teams were lucky enough to be selected for the Mortal Kombat of College Basketball!

As always, I'll be picking Sub-Zero!!

However, I do have some bad news for those of you Illinois fans b/c all though the Illini are a No. 1 seed in the DANGEROUS and EXCITING N.I.T., you won’t be able to go to the 1st-round game because Cirque du Soleil is performing at the Assembly Hall this week.  But irregardless of that, don’t think for one minute that the N.I.T. is not taken seriously by the participating institutions and its fans!

Is this really more important than the N.I.T.?!?!

So here are my predictions for the real Final Four…that’s right the N.I.T. Final Four; Memphis, Missippi St, UCONN and Cincy.  And despite the close call to Northeastern University…I’m  going with UCONN to win it all…So to all of those so called fans who will watch the SISSY NCAA Tourney and not the N.I.T. you guys are ….“Simply RiCOCKulous”… we all know the real action is in the N.I.T.!

– Kennedy Wong  a.k.a. The Blasian

Too Bad, It's Over!

Now that the Olympics are over it is time for me to officially start my commentary on the NCAA basketball season. In our group it has been discussed that there is not a clear cut group of number ones and even more so, number twos. Based on the rankings right now (which seeding is not based on), Ohio State would get a 2 seed with 7 losses, that’s right seven, and West Virginia would get the final one with 6 losses. Really? There’s something for The Blasian to write about right there.  Ohio State lost to North Carolina, Minnesota, and Michigan (plus their quality losses). Wow they deserve to be in the top 10 like I need to be treated for anorexia.

This season does not make sense, pre-season we had Kansas at one (ok they are still around there) and Texas and Michigan State at two depending on the poll. Texas fell apart! 17-0 and since? 6-7.

Michigan State  at 22-7 also lost to North Carolina to add to their 16-14 record, apparently they had two quality wins out of their 16. I will take them over the Buckeyes in the rematch.  But that’s the Big 10.

Pac 10? Are you out there? There is a chance that everyone in the conference could have double digit losses. A stretch maybe, but still a possibility. I guess Cal gets in, but it depends on who wins the PAC 10 Tournament, they might only get two teams in.  Is this really the conference that has: Stanford, UCLA, Arizona, and USC?

Count on him down the Stretch!

SEC basketball is back, kind of, not really, but they have Kentucky and Tennessee. Do not count on Kentucky when it matters though, I mean they have Calipari, the worse close game coach around. He called a timeout the other day giving the opposing team a chance for a shot to tie or win. Afterwards, Calipari said “It’s the dumbest Timeout, I have ever called!” (True) but what about timeouts you haven’t called  JOHN?!? He’s bad on both sides of the decision making.

Now I am not going to fill out a bracket and post it on Reverse Oreo. Come on, some secretary is going to fill out a bracket based on colors and mascots and get 75% correct.  So I am going to take my likely final four, before the bracket is out and after its out.

Pre-Bracket Final Four

Kentucky – out in the final four because of Calipari

Syracuse- They have been pretty consistent

Kansas- They have two big games to wrap up the season before the Big 12 tourney (KSU and @ Mizzou).

Michigan State- They are mature and the held Purdue to 44 pts over the weekend

All I care to remember from the KBL

Korean Basketball:  We have talked about how terrible KBL guard play and wondered out loud why they haven’t brought over a foreign player to run the show. This is further confused by the history of the league that once banned foreigners over the height of 6’8″, which has since been abolished. Yet they have never shown an interest in guards from outside Korea. Still a foreign concept here, and I am left more confused after watching the daily games.

I leave you with this video, enjoy

Salute

The Bearded Guy

Two of my best friends have served in the US Military and I noticed that in our conversations after they both got back from overseas, that they both kept using the phrase “RiCOCKulous! Now, I’m not ashamed to admit that it took me a couple of minutes to catch on but ever since I did, I have never missed a chance to use this fantastic word in a conversation. “What’s that? Your car won’t start….RiCOCKulous”. “Huh, your wife I sleeping with your sister??…That’s really RiCOCKulous!”… “What?? After 18 years of child support you just found out that the kid aint yours?!…Simply RiCOCKulous!” So as my tribute not just to my buddies or the U.S. Military, but to all of those fine people protecting their respective corner’s of the world I bring to you the 1st of my weekly musings, called (drum roll please)……….“Simply RiCOCKulous!

Now let’s get started….

1) This week, I was all prepared to go off on the situation of Mr. Gunsmoke Arenas. I mean by no ways do I condone violence but to be suspended basically for a DANCE, that his teammates participated in aint right! I mean we all know he will get suspended and rightfully so, for his decision to be the T.I. of the NBA but at least let the due process take its course Mr. Stern. For Pete’s sake, have a heart and let the man have fun, before he has to start picking up the Soap in front of guys that look likes Shaq’s Big Brother…….Simply RiCOCKulous!

2) Plus, I have a greater issue with not letting athletes be entertaining anymore. I mean ever since the NFL decided to become the league of Nuns and not let you even celebrate after a touchdown…Sports has just taken a turn for the worse. Now at days, I can’t blame guys who let their wives take the remote during the game and turn it to Desperate Housewives or whatever monotonous drivel is on…because I’m sure it’s more entertaining. (Ok, maybe I just went a lil overboard, but you get my point.) For me, I miss players with flash like Deion Sanders. Now you have to legally change your name every season like Ochocinco, in order to provide a little entertainment to the fans. For men sports is our Soap Opera, so let us enjoy the Dam drama and pageantry. That goes to you NFL, NBA, and FIFA…..Simply RiCOCKulous!!

3) Speaking of Footy, my favorite Italian Player Mario Balotelli was fined by the Italian League for clapping at the same fans who were RACIALLY abusing him and another black player (this also might be another reason players don’t want to play in Italy anymore The Mark). I applaud Mr. Balotelli because a clap is definitely not the hand gesture I would have given them. And even more preposterous, the fans of the team that was doing the abuse got no sort of reprimand or anything of the sort…Simply RiCOCKulous!

4) And finally, the Floyd Mayweather vs. Manny Pacquiao Fight! This is just simply Mind Blowing! How do you let egos get in the way of what is going to be the most COLOSSAL boxing match of this century? This fight was going to be the EPIC fight I was going to tell my grandkids about! And now Bob Arum and Manny, you have denied, my poor innocent, yet to be born Grandchildren that chance! Think of the children, for Christ’s sake! SIMPLY RiCOCKulous!!!

Now the only fight that they will be having, will be in the courtroom as Manny is taking a beating in the court of public opinion about the voices in his head telling him the blood tests will make him week, and is suing Pretty Boy for libel. Personally, I understand both sides: Manny wants to stay within his superstitions and maybe letting his voodoo medicine give him the strength of Hercules while Mayweather, is FINALLY going to fight someone who could beat his ass, and he wants to make sure he loses on the up and up. But the final straw is what has happened since… Manny has agreed to fight Joshua Clottey, instead. WHO?!?! No disrespect Joshua, (and I will be pulling for you simply because I’m a salty boxing fan) but I find the whole situation is SIMPLY RiCOCKulous!!!