Super Bowl XLV – An Anti-Steelers Preview

I think the title says it all but I really hate the Pittsburgh Steelers. This post will be totally biased in favor of the Green Bay Packers and I don’t even really like the Green Bay Packers. Being a Browns fan hasn’t given me very many great memories, especially lately. The Brian Sipe/Bernie Kosar era is long gong and that one good Tim Couch season seems so long ago. The one thing that has brought me joy during those miserable seasons is hating on the Steelers.

Who's with me?

The Packers are a 3 point favorite going into the game, which makes it easier for me to spew pro-Green Bay rhetoric without looking like (much of) a fool. To be honest, this game looks like it will be a good one. Both teams are hot but Green Bay looks to have the most momentum coming in. Before I break down the game I’ll give you the particulars.

Super Bowl XLV will be played in Cowboys Stadium and kickoff should be somewhere around 6:25 pm EST. There will be like 10,000 hours of coverage devoted to the game, not including the all day pre-game show and yukfest on FOX and ESPN. The game will be on FOX and your broadcasters will be the loathsome Joe Buck and the knowledgable Troy Aikman. Pam Oliver and Chris Myers will be bringing you speculation and rumors from the sidelines. In the studio, the FOX team will be Curt Menefee, Terry Bradshaw, Howie Long, Jimmy Johnson and Michael Strahan. They most likely won’t give you anything concrete but be somewhere near the truth so that they can boast right after the final whistle has blown. Odds are that Howie Long will be the most serious person on the show but then you remember that he made Firestorm and he’s pretty hard to take seriously.

Yes, this happened

This will be Pittsburgh’s eighth Super Bowl and their third in the last six years. They’ve won six of the seven they’ve already played. The Steelers won the AFC North and had a bye in the opening round of the playoffs. In the Divisional round they faced the Baltimore Ravens and dominated them defensively but still needed a late touchdown to win 23-24. The Steelers D held the Ravens to 126 total yards on offense and were down 21-7 at the half. The offense lost two fumbles and one of them was returned for a touchdown. In the AFC Championship game they beat the surprising Jets 24-19. The game wasn’t really that close. The Steelers led 24-0 with 1:09 left in the 2nd quarter. Roethlisberger didn’t look sharp, throwing 2 interceptions. It helps when the “brilliant” Rex Ryan punts with 1:43 to go in the game from the Pittsburgh 44 yard line. Did the Jets really think they were getting the ball back with that little time?

This will be the fifth Super Bowl for Green Bay. They’ve won three of the four they’ve played in. The Packers beat Chicago 10-3 in the final game of the season to earn a Wild Card birth. They pretty much handled Philadelphia in the opening round of the playoffs with Aaron Rodgers tossing 3 TD’s at Lincoln Financial Field. In the second round, Green Bay travelled to Atlanta and pretty much OWNED them after the first ten minutes of the game. Against the Falcons, Rodgers threw three more TD’s and ran for another. The Packers didn’t punt in that game. In the NFC Championship, Green bay beat Chicago in Soldier Field 21-14. This time Aaron Rodgers didn’t throw any touchdowns and was picked off twice. Not a very Aaron Rodgers postseason performance.

Aaron Rodgers is the best quarterback in the postseason. The stats don’t lie. Who has thrown for more yards than Rodgers this postseason? Nobody. I know Rodgers has played in one more game but his 263.3 yards per game average is 84 yards more than Roethlisberger’s. Rodgers’ QB rating is 109.2, the highest in the postseason, compared to 75.5 for Big Ben. Rodgers has six touchdown passes, one rushing touchdown and only two interceptions. Roethlisberger has two touchdown passes, one rushing touchdown and two interceptions. Aaron Rodgers has also completed fifteen passes of 20+ yards compared to four for Roethlisberger. I know Ben Roethlisberger is mobile but so is Rodgers. Look at the game against the Falcons. They had his sacked at least ten times in that game and he was able to get away and make a positive play. Sure, Ben Roethlisberger is 2-0 in Super Bowls but Rodgers is the hotter quarterback coming in.

Rodgers is on fire

The Steelers look to have the better running game but Pittsburgh only holds a half a yard advantage per game. Both have four touchdowns but Pittsburgh has fumbled three times compared to two for Green Bay. The Steelers have the best defense in the league but are giving up 21.5 points per game this postseason compared to 17 for the Packers. Don’t forget, Green Bay played all three of their playoff games on the road. The Steelers have the best rushing defense but the Packers are second. These teams are so close in many stats so look for this to be a pretty good game

This game will come down to who takes advantage of their opportunities and makes fewer mistakes. The Green Bay Packers have shown that they can convert on third-downs and make the most of their red zone opportunities. Green Bay is just too hot right now. This team seems to be doing whatever they want on offense and Tramon Williams is quickly moving up the ladder of being a great cornerback in the league.

Rodgers needs this

I don’t think we understand how much Aaron Rodgers wants to win this game. I mean every football player wants to win the Super Bowl but it would be huge for Aaron Rodgers to have a Super Bowl ring. He can start coming out of the shadow of Brett Favre. He’s only 27, the same age as Brett Favre when he won Super Bowl XXXII. Plus, Green Bay would be vindicated for choosing Rodgers over an aging Brett Favre three seasons ago. Rodgers can own this town with a win and, who knows, even surpass Favre if he’s able to get multiple Super Bowl rings. Don’t tell me Green Bay GM Ted Thompson doesn’t want this badly either. You just know he wants to stick it to Favre because Favre’s been trying to stick it to the organization and especially Ted Thompson since he left. After seeing Favre’s act over the past three seasons, I’m looking forward to Green Bay getting over on him too.

Another reason I want the Steelers to lose is because I hate Ben Roethlisberger. I hated him even before everyone found out how much of a douche he was. I hated Roethlisberger before hating Roethlisberger was cool. I can’t bear to see Roethlisberger winning another ring. I know one thing, Ben Roethlisberger clone, Chase Daniel will be watching this game with a chubby. Chase Daniel is not really relevant to this Super Bowl discussion but I just like mentioning him whenever Roethlisberger is involved. Remember how hard Daniel’s tried to look and act like Roethlisberger while at Missouri? It was actually quite embarrassing watching him with  Ben’s facial hair, Ben’s wristbands, Ben’s eye black, Ben’s wristbands, Ben’s mannerisms at the line and so on. Another reason to mention Chase Daniel is to mention how much I hate Missouri. Not just the college but the state as a whole. C’mon people, if Missouri failed to exist in the morning would we really miss it?

Douche

Lea Michele of Glee fame will sing America the Beautiful during pre-game festivities and Christina Aguilera will sing the national anthem. I didn’t realize Christina Aguilera was relevant enough to merit the singing of the national anthem. Being a native of Pennsylvania probably didn’t hurt her cause. The Black Eyed Peas will perform at halftime…errrr…..at the Bridgestone Halftime Show. Does anyone really like the Black Eyed Peas? I don’t think a single one of my friends has ever mentioned liking or disliking the Black Eyed Peas. Is it just me or does it seem that the halftime entertainment is always someone past their prime or someone you wouldn’t expect to be performing at the halftime show? The Black Eyed Peas are never ones to shy away from being on TV. I think I’ve seen them on various worldwide shows, kicking off something like the World Cup or Oprah’s visit to Michigan Avenue in Chicago. Almost every time I’ve seen them at some live event, they seem to perform My Humps. I think they have more songs than that but they continue to trot out that ridiculous song every time they need people to remember who they are. Something tells me that My Humps won’t be played at something as family friendly as the Super Bowl. Remember when Prince got in trouble for playing his guitar behind the curtain?

Rachel from Glee

My prediction: Green Bay 30 – Pittsburgh 20

I’m not telling you to bet the house or anything like that. This is coming from my gut. If you’re into placing a little friendly wager, go to covers.com to get all of you information. Enjoy the Super Bowl, even if you have to listen to Joe Buck.

The Winter Olympics – Does Anyone Care?

The Winter Olympics start on Friday and I think I care less about them than I did about the Super Bowl.  The Super Bowl had a team I don’t care about (New Orleans) against a team I hate (Indianapolis).  Throw in the fact that I’m not in the states and the Super Bowl might as well have been the NHL Finals, except for the whole Jim Nantz thing.

I think the Penguins won the last Stanley Cup but I'm not sure

I guess I used to watch the Winter Olympics but I can’t remember anything memorable happening except for the Miracle on Ice, the Nancy Kerrigan – Tonya Harding thing and Dan Jansen getting his heart-broken over and over.  The only thing the Winter Olympics might be good for is to introduce you (me) to exotic, beautiful, foreign, female figure skaters.  It started with Katarina Witt in and then it was Kristi Yamaguchi and Oksana Baiul.  I don’t think I’ve watched too much of the last two Winter Olympics because I can’t think of any hot chicks from those games.

I’m sure the Winter Olympics offer more than just watching scantily clad, hot females, but what?  Why should I spend more than five minutes watching these games?  Part of my problem watching the Olympics is that the coverage was always America Über Alles no matter what channel they were on.  That won’t be a problem here in Korea but I still don’t care.  I’m pretty sure the coverage here will be very Korea-centric.  If a South Korean wins a  silver or bronze medal, forget about it.  If a gold is won by a Korean athlete, that athlete will automatically be the best ever at that sport and later we’ll find out how Korea invented that particular sport.    

If Kim Yu-Na wins gold in Vancouver, look for some history to be rewritten

To be honest, I’m not much of a winter person and maybe that’s why the 21st Winter Olympiad is being met with so much indifference by me.  Wait, I hate running but I am a huge track and field guy during the Summer Olympics so the lack of love for the cold can’t be the reason.  If anyone has any ideas on why I should watch the games from Vancouver, let me know. 

Is the fact that I loathe Canada a reason for my apathy?

America's upstairs neighbor

Dear Football (some sort of John Deere letter)

Football said I wasn't listening enough or something like that, I dont remember I wasn't really paying attention.

I feel like we don’t know each other anymore.  We have been growing apart, although it’s not like I have not tried to stay together. We have both done spiteful things, but you especially Football. 

First, it started with my retirement from the game, not that I wouldn’t have continued to play, but I ran out of eligibility, and the demand for offensive linemen overseas is almost negative. But I made it up to you by going on a bowl trip across Texas catching 3 games in five days including a game between Michael Oher and Michael Crabtree. It was a shift, but a great transition in our relationship. It also came with the addition of my ability to bet on games without NCAA violations. 

The Michael Bowl

 

Following that, you gave me a great Super Bowl last year, besides you letting  Pittsburgh win their sixth title, but I could not hold it against you. I covered the spread and saw a great game. Things were going strong between us. I had a party with stadium seating and more food than our house could eat for the next week. 

Then I started missing the old us! Playing in games and such, I didn’t believe I would miss summer camp  in 80 percent humidity. But I did, and things started to go down hill from there.  I got a terrible job working on most Saturdays and missed several great games.  Especially a classic between Michigan and Notre Dame, a game I wish it was possible for both teams to lose. Not to mention what was continually happening in the pro ranks to my hometown Chiefs, a home loss to the Raiders. Really Football, how could you do that to me? 

Things took another turn for the worse when I moved to Korea. Football, you just stopped communicating with me! You were never on television and I would only get five-minute updates from you online. You changed all the times you were on, all of sudden I had to get up in the middle of the night to catch day games. Whats up with that football?  You said I changed, but look at you Football, coming on in the middle of the night! 

Yet, we were still working through things,  I started blogging my opinions on games, and making a few picks. But you could see the distance between us. Out of spite you made the Big 12 title game too close, and then hurt Colt McCoy in the first series of the BCS title  game, making it completely anti-climactic.  You have done some hurtful things Football! 

Football messing with everything!

Then came the playoffs, and you seemed to spite me at every corner. I couldn’t pick a game to save my life for two straight weeks.  I was a bookies dreams, and I think I would have had my knee stomped both times by someone looking like Joe Pesci. 

Finally you dropped the bomb on me, you made the Super Bowl on a Monday morning, not any Monday, but the first Monday I had to teach in 8 weeks.  I couldn’t even call in sick, since another teacher had told his co-teacher he was skipping work to watch the game!  Any plan was foiled.  At first, I thought I would ignore you and come back to you later in the day. Then I checked and the Colts were up 10, and I thought you were going to give me a blow out so I would not feel bad about missing the game.  Such was not the case,  you gave the world a second half for the ages with gutsy calls, and Hank Baskett references for years to come and I missed it all and have only seen the 8 minutes of highlights on NFL.com. Now that there isn’t even slow transition out of the year (no postseason pro bowl), I have to let you know how you have hurt me, but let’s try to mend some fences before August, maybe in late April perhaps? 

Regretfully yours 

The Bearded Guy 

PS. Football did you realize that basketball is trying to rob your cradle? Making your book “Hurricane Season” into a movie about basketball, while still using the same Mascot? You might have realized it because it went straight to DVD as a Blockbuster exclusive. Basketball’s cruel hearted too, just ask The Blasian. 

Weird, I thought Hurricane Season was about the Football Patriots and Joe McKnight?

Best Super Bowl Ad 

Picks from THE BLASIAN: The only picks that matter!! (2010 SUPER FREAKIN BOWL)

YEAAAAAAAAAAAAA BABY!! It’s the big game, and I’m very excited about it!  Unfortunately, I live in Korea and probably won’t see it because Super Bowl Sunday Fun Day for you guys in the good ole U.S. is Monday NO-FUN DAY here in the ROK!!  Korea, for those of you who don’t know is about 14 hrs ahead of Eastern Standard Time, this means that when you are relaxing and watching the game with your buffalo wings, pizza, beer and friends I’ll be at WORK!….b/c it’s a normal Monday Morning in the ROK and the only three guys who care about the Super Bowl in Korea are writing this blog (ok, that might be a little bit of an exaggeration, but it certainly feels that way).

I mean if there was EVER an Annual Sporting Day that should be INTERNATIONALLY RECOGNIZED as a holiday it should be the SUPER BOWL!! (Don’t get mad World Cup Fans, I said ANNUAL!) So while you are at home screaming at the tube (b/c for some reason we think Manning will ACTUALLY hear us)… don’t forget us, the guys here at the Reverse Oreo and pour a little buffalo sauce out for your Homies in Korea!!

Please wipe the slob from your screen, when you are done!

And just between me and you, I have decided this week to pull the ole, call in sick deal! So for those others who might want to join in….might I present to you the:

“TOP 3 KOREAN, CALL IN SICK AND GET OFF TO WATCH THE SUPERBOWL EXCUSES”:

#3. Cough, Cough, I think I have the Swine Flu?!? (not higher on the list b/c this one might cause your town to get evacuated)

#2. Ohh, I have explosive diahreha. (b/c this is really an epidemic in Korea…..might be b/c of all the spicy food, but shhh….keep that part a secret)

#1. I think I slept in front of a fan last night and now I might die, so I need to take the day off! (Ohh what’s that?!? Never heard of FAN DEATH!? Well that’s b/c you are not in Korea!)

Loosely Translated: Sleep Near the Fan...and you DIE!!

Also I would like to point out for those keeping score at home, that THE BLASIAN went 2 for 2 with my last picks and I’ m an impressive 5-5 for all the playoff games. Now some people here at the Reverse Oreo will tell they went perfect last week too because they beat the spread…but to those people I say GARBAGE b/c picking the actual WINNER is the only thing that really counts. So with no further adieu:

Indianapolis Colts vs. New Orleans Saints

Remember the Bloody Sock controversy awhile back in baseball when the Yanks were playing the Red Sox! I was sooooooo tired of hearing about Curt Schilling and his bloody sock. I mean by the end of the series, people were saying they say the image of the Virgin Mary in the Blood on his sock!  SERIOUSLY?!?! And until this Super Bowl, I think that was the most I have EVER heard about an ankle in my life. Well CONGRATULATIONS are in order for Mr. Dwight Freeney and his ankle, for utterly destroying Curt Schilling and his nasty sock in terms of Media Coverage. I mean I don’t think anybody’s Ankle has gotten this much coverage since the Iliad!

Sorry Curt, Your Ankle is now #2!

Too bad in the big scheme it doesn’t really matter though, as I have said before the Aints are the team of destiny this year and will win! Payton will be awesome and is the better quarterback (although not by much), but Mr. Freeney and his ankle won’t be there to help slow-down D.Breezy! And that will affect the Colt’s D which also won’t be 100%.  So,  I expect the D.Beezy to have even more of a field day than usual! Also remember that Payton tends to have trouble with really good Safeties and D.Sharper is one of the best of all time!  I give the Offensive Edge to the Colts but not by much and only b/c of Payton and the Defensive Advantage goes to the Aints. So this one will be tight and down to the wire..but in the end make way for your

2010 SUPERBOWL CHAMPIONS..(WHO DAT?!?!)…THE NEW ORLEANS SAINTS!

Pick: Saints: INDY 42 – N.O. 43

Bet You Never Thought This Would Happen Either!!

– Kennedy Wong a.k.a. The BLASIAN

The Super Bowl – I Really Don’t Care About The Game, The Greatness That Is Jim Nantz

Maybe it’s because I live in Korea but I really have no interest in this game.  Neither team appeals to me.  There’s no hype here.  I don’t have to read about it in the papers.  If this game happens or not, it wouldn’t matter to me.  All I know is that New Orleans is playing Indianapolis in Miami and I think this is Super Bowl XLIV. 

The game is on CBS with Jim Nantz and Phil Simms doing the game.  You should be in for a treat if you get to watch it because Jim Nantz makes anything better.  Simms is hit or miss but Nantz is always gold.  If I were going to watch this game I would be interested solely in the way Nantz is calling the game and making Simms his bitch.  Jim Nantz should be doing all major sporting events.  He already OWNS The Masters and March Madness (even when Billy Packer was there).  Nantz should be a free agent and able to call all big events on other networks.  He should be in Vancouver for the Winter Olympics and in South Africa for the World Cup.  Those events would benefit from having a Jim Nantz call the action.  World Series, NBA Finals, Wimbledon,…… whatever, Nantz makes it all better.  Plus, for all you How I Met Your Mother fans, check out Jim Nantz on the Perfect Week episode.  He nailed it.  Even if you’re not a fan of the show, watch it, you’ll change you’re mind after seeing Nantz interviewing Barney.  Jim Fucking Nantz.

This guy should be calling everything

On to the actual game:

Line:  Indianapolis (-5), O/U 56.5

Pick: Colts 

I know New Orleans scores a lot of points but Peyton Manning is the MVP of the damn league.  He can do whatever he wants, whenever he wants.  I don’t care about Dwight Freeney being injured.  This game begins and ends with Peyton Manning.  This game is going under. 

Indianapolis 31-23 

I’m kind of glad I’m not at home for the coverage because for some reason I have a feeling that Hurricane Katrina will makes its way into the subplot of this game and it really shouldn’t.  Neither thing has anything to do with the other.  If New Orleans wins it won’t erase anything that happened in the wake of the hurricane.  New Orleans won’t miraculously be a better place if the Saints win.  You can interview all the people you want but a Super Bowl win won’t make anything better; it will just make the people who were affected by the storm forget for a while.

No matter who wins, this still happened

Jersey Shore – Goodbye Season 1, It Will Never Be The Same

I finally watched the season finale of Jersey Shore and, I’m serious when I say this, I will miss the show.  At the same time, I don’t think this season can be topped.  I know they’re coming back but I think it might be a mistake.  The show was too good, too fresh in the first season.  The cast members were average Guidos and Guidettes.  No more.  Now everyone is a star and they have gotten around.  Watching season one you got the feeling that none of the cast members ever ventured outside their neighborhoods but now they’re going to The Grammys, Fashion Week and, for sure, The Super Bowl.  Snooki and The Situation were much better when they had no worldview.  Now, they’re celebrities and they are going to act like celebrities. 

MTV, in all their wisdom, wants to capitalize on something hot so they’ll do this by killing the show.  They want new episodes in a hurry so now the cast, including Angelina, will be back together for a season two.  Except, forget about that whole being on the Jersey Shore thing.  The new season will be filmed somewhere, probably South Beach, so they can start filming as soon as possible.  Also, each cast member will be making ten large an episode.  So, they don’t have to pretend to work in order to stay in the house and they don’t get to hang out with other Guidos and Guidettes.

The cast is the same but they will never be the same.

Snooki was not palatable to guys hanging out on the Jersey Shore but she will definitely be a hot commodity in South Beach now that’s she’s a star and making $10K an episode.  The Situation literally repelled women in season one; girls would not even answer his calls.  Now, he’ll have to beat them off with a stick.  What will become of Vinny?  I think we’ll see the biggest change in him.  I don’t think mom will be bringing food and clean laundry all the way down to South Beach. 

If MTV was smart, they would bring the cast together again for season two at the same beach house and keep this going, season after season, until every cast member dropped out.  Some would get married, some would get pregnant, some might be in jail.  I’m sure by season five the field would be thinned.  In season 15, The Situation and Snooki would be the only ones left. 

If I ran MTV this is what Jersey Shore season 15 would look like.

Will I watch the new season?  Hell yeah!  I just hope Sammi and Ronnie aren’t dating in season two.  Let Ronnie fly.  I can see Angelina and, a hopefully single, Sammi being the biggest cock-blockers ever.  Whatever happens, we will be able to figure out where the show is going in the first ten minutes of season two.  If they have changed, we’ll know. 

Cockblock much?

As for the finale, most people called it anticlimactic but I enjoyed the show.  They seemed like family in the end.  Mike, no matter how much the others protest, was the man of the house.  He kept things together.  Is he still a douche?  Yes, but he does have a sensitive side.  He was like an older brother to Snooki.  Well, until they made out in the hot tub.  Does anyone find it odd that Vinny is the only one who caught something (pink eye) at the Jersey Shore?  I thought it was funny that they all realized that the whole summer they didn’t really spend any time on the beach so they had to make up for it on the last weekend.  Of course, Ronnie and Sammi had to go do their own thing the last night.  Why should  that night be any different from the rest of the summer?

I gotta be me.

Bye season one.  You will be missed.

NFL Conference Championships – Favre, Sanchise, Favre, Sanchise, Favre

I know, I’ve been a terrible prognosticator but I’m not giving up.  I’ve gambled for far too long to step away just because I’ve been a Mush for a few weeks.  Things will turn around.  If not, who cares, I’ll be in Hong Kong for a week so I could give a shit. 

Before I get to my picks I have to talk about the coverage of these games.  I won’t see any of these games and I don’t get ESPN of the NFL Network but I can just imagine what the talking heads are….well….talking about.  I’m pretty sure the coverage has revolved and will revolve around Brett Favre and Mark Sanchez.  Don’t let The Blasian fool you, he definitely has much man-love for the guy.  As Shakespeare once wrote, “The lady doth protest too much, methinks.”  Replace, “The lady” with, “The Blasian”. 

The Bard knew how The Blasian felt for The Sanchise

Back to the coverage.  Most people probably don’t know that Drew Brees and Peyton Manning are playing in these games because Brett Favre and Mark Sanchez are hogging all the coverage.  Has John Madden come out of retirement yet?  How is he not doing the Vikings – Saints game?  If you think it’s bad this week, imagine if the Jets and Vikings both win on Sunday.  Then we will have two weeks of non-stop Favre, Sanchez talk.  If the Vikings win, they might as well change the name from Super Bowl XLIV to Super Bowl Favre.  I can’t see any of the coverage and I’m already annoyed.

On to the games:

NY Jets @ Indianapolis (-7)

Pick:  Colts     

Blah blah blah….the Colts offense is awesome.  Blah blah blah……The Sanchise is a rookie.  Blah blah blah….Rex Ryan is fat.  Blah blah blah….there’s no way the Jets win this one.

Indianapolis 23-10

Minnesota @ New Orleans (-3.5)

Pick:  Vikings

Blah blah blah…both teams play in a dome.  Blah blah blah….Sean Payton forgot how to coach the last time he was in the Championship game.  Blah blah blah…….Adrian Peterson.  Blah blah blah……Sidney Rice.  Blah blah blah….BRETT FUCKING  FAVRE.

Minnesota 31-27

Sound the horn Vikings fans.  That sound you hear is Packer fan killing himself.  Enjoy Super Bowl Favre.

The Blasian likey?